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I'm sorry for the delay of no posting....however, this time I have an excuse that is a little more legit than in the past! I have had one mid-term and one final to study for and it has taken up literally all of my time! Thankfully after today I will be done with all of that and maybe even have a new post up by the end of the week!! So please don't give up on me just yet! :~)

Song of the Month

Once again this is another late post that has been in the makings for awhile! But here it is nonetheless!! This month's song is...... Beethoven's "Pathetique Op. 13 No.8".

Lately I have been listening to classical music and have truly been able to enjoy it!! I think it is definitely one of those catagories in music that falls under the label of an aesthetic beauty. It displays such emotion from the composer and yet at the same time it is objectively relaying a message or feeling. It’s sad to see how we have degraded beauty to pleasure! Doing so only makes true beauty (which hurts more often than not) hard to come by. Maybe someday we will step out of this storm of "in the eye of the beholder" and really begin to see with our eye that which is objectively in front of us (not inside).

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Movie Review

Alright....I know it has been an incredibly long time since I have posted anything!! I have received posts explaining peoples agitation and as of yet I have neglected to relieve them of their frustrations. So in an act of desperation (and guilt) I will attempt to write a quick review of the Johnny Cash movie "Walk the Line."

The movie as a whole was good from a film makers perspective. Reese Witherspoon and Joaquin Phoenix did an excellent job as actors and the script was well written.

However, the movie hinged around Cash's drug addiction and the countless times he cheated on his wife. It was a plot of tension that did not seem to resolve in the way that was expected. Not much (if any) was mentioned about the life he led afterwards which included his spiritual reformation. It focused on his affair with June Carter (thankfully without any obscenity) and his constant struggle with cocain. Other than the scene where he and June walked up to the little community church, there was no refrence to his spiritual life (I guess that can be expected from Hollywood). His marriage to June Carter was the breath of fresh air at the end of the movie. Yet the release was not as fulfilling as it could have been.

This movie for me was a kind of introduction to Johnny Cash and his music. It was interesting to find out how someone as famous as Johnny Cash actual got started...here he was in a band of three, living the way all normal suburban families lived and by chance he makes a record that eventually sells millions!!! He achieves the American dream, only to let it go to his head! I think the old cliche "power corrupts and absolutely power corrupts absolutely" could be said of fame as well. Thankfully his story has a "happy" ending!

To sum up...I enjoyed the movie and would probably watch it again knowing that there were many things I missed and didn't quite understand. The movie definitely requires a more mature audience (my younger brother didn't quite care for it). It’s a bit slow, but that is necessary for the story to make any sense. If anyone else has seen the movie yet I would love to hear your thoughts on it!!!

"The living force within them is of fire and its seeds have their source in heaven, but their guilt-ridden bodies make them slow and they are dulled by earthly limbs and dying flesh. It is this that gives them their fears and desires, their griefs and joys. Closed in the blind darkness of this prison they do not see out to the winds of air. Even when life leaves them on their last day of light, they are not wholly freed from all the many ills and miseries of the body which must harden in them over the long years and become ingrained in ways we cannot understand." Virgil - The Aeneid

Song of the Month

This months song is.....(suspense mounting!!)
"Deviation" by Bela Fleck and New Grass Revival. Bela is awesome on the banjo as always! However, the guitar solo is what really stood out to me. The speed and clarity is amazing!

Saint or Theologian Part II

Well after my last post I had a feeling that some heavy questions were going to be coming my way...as well as some extra defining!! So I decided that instead of making a huge comment I would write my response in a blog format.

I'll start off with defining (to the best of my ability) the difference between a saint and a theologian.
A theologian is one who contemplates matters of the spiritual realm. Such as the Law and Gospel, Faith, Predestination ect. Theology is a very important aspect of the Christian faith and certainly not something that should be neglected. If Christianity is what I believe, then surely I need to learn what exactly it is. However, what my point was in my last post (which I did not make clear enough) was the fact that theology is often taken aside as if it is something all by its self. When really it is meant to be a part or piece of the puzzle to the Christian life. To set it aside and make it ones sole focus is to no longer be a "whole soul". Merely using ones head and forgetting about the heart and hands not only leads to an unbalance but to a distorted view of Christianity. The same mistake can be made with the heart and hands as well.

A Saint however, is one who encompasses the head, heart and hands. Thus being a whole soul. The title "Saint" is much bigger than the title of "Theologian". Because it means that a person not only has the head knowledge but also is about their Father's business (just as Christ was). Christ did not merely preach theology or sit around talking about the mysteries of God with the disciples but simultaneously He was about His Father's buisness. This is not to say that Jesus did not talk about the mysteries of the spiritual realm -"Eat my flesh, and drink my blood" - but it is to say that He understood the "balance". The balance of equal extremes. Of knowing theology inside and out, of being about His Father's buisness, and the emotion that goes along with all of that. Of not having His eye's on the Law and trying so hard to fulfill it, but on the Father. Because if one has their eye's solely on the law, then naturally they are going to sin. However, if their eyes are on God then naturally they are going to fulfill the Law.

Christ came and died so that our fulfilling the Law was no longer required if we were to get into heaven. It is through our communion with Him that the Law is satisfied. Not because we are consciously trying to appease the Law, but because it is what comes natural through our communion with the Father. Christ became our mediator granting us instant access to God, making communion with Him possible.

All this to say…if we are in communion with God then everything else will fall into place. Becoming hyper focused on theology, or ministry only leads to utter bewilderment (or separate denominations).

Saint or Theologian?

I read an excerpt from A.W. Tozer the other day that really impacted my outlook on the Christian life. Here is the excerpt: "God will not hold us responsible to understand the mysteries of election, predestination and the divine sovereignty. The best and safest way to deal with these truths is to raise our eyes to God and in deepest reverence and say, 'O Lord, Thou knowest.' Those things belong to the deep and mysterious profound of God's omniscience. Prying into them may make theologians, but it will never make saints."

It never had occurred to me that there is a distinction between a saint and a theologian. The more I thought about it the more the realization hit me (harder and harder and harder and......you get the picture). I then began to question what it was that made a saint. Obviously a theologian is one who contemplates those things which deal with the nature of God's sovereignty and of Faith, but what was that distinct feature that separated the saints from the others? Tozer outlined what constituted a saint as someone who was not only sensitive to the Holy Spirit but most importantly fulfilled those desires of the spirit. It is the mark of someone who satisfies those yearnings towards "Godliness". This obviously cannot be done through selfish ambitions/motives, but through a sincere love towards Christ and His work on the cross. It is through this that theology falls into place. When we are in constant communion with God, all of our thoughts and ideas will be centered around Him. If your eyes are constantly on the Father, how can one go wrong? This of course seems like the ideal way of living, unfortunately we do not live in an ideal world. There is the problem of sin and the fact that we aren't "good" enough to make it on our own.

Paul who warned us against getting the Law and the Gospel mixed up, did not meta cognitively come up with such a profound distinction through monologue. Rather through his constant communion with God and his constant pursual to satisfy those yearnings within his spirit. To easily can one get so caught up in his/her own mind that they grey up all that which was once black and white. Paul (as well as the other apostles) sought to be holy just as Christ was holy. Seeking fellowship as a means to help grow and strengthen each other in the Faith, not as some sort of social gathering where everyone catches up on all the gossip (I am as guilty of it just as much as the next person).

People wonder why there is no revival among the Church....how can there be? Either we are so caught up in our theology that fulfilling the desires of the spirit does not matter or we are so busy with "ministry" that we forget what we are doing and why.

In conclusion, it all comes back to our relationship with God the Father. How can we Love creation if we do not Love the creator? How can we understand if we do not commune? And how can we satisfy the yearnings of the spirit if we are not willing to cultivate them? It seems that a Saint would encompass theology; however, much to often are the two separated.

I'm still alive!

This is just to let you all know that I am still in the process of coming up with another blog! And to say that I have not forgotten about blogging! In the meantime however, if you wish to see the epidemy of self-esteem and what it can do to a person I would suggest watching "American Idol"!! Just for laughs! :~)

"In my beginning is my end"

Lately I have been seriously dwelling on the concept of time.... why? I really cannot say. It is this force of reality that as of late made itself known to me (or I to it..). It is this idea that is taken lightly or subconsciously. However, by it we live and breathe!!

Time; it is this constant motion that never fails to stop. Day end and day out it never ceases. But keeps the same pace never slowing and never accelerating. By it we see everything yet cannot see the thing itself. By it we love, and rejoice! By it we grow and learn and by it we are destroyed. Not just physically but mentally and spiritually as well. We become frustrated by it yet cannot imagine a life without it. It is this very thing that we often wish away which leads to our death.

Every moment passing without warning. The present is nothing more than a memory. In the past, present and future are held. Only by our memory do we recall the present which ultimately is the past. For one to be conscious of the present is to be outside time. Thus "to be conscious is not to be in time" -T.S. Elliot. If one were to be outside time he would no longer remember or predict but just simply KNOW.
There is a frustration that I believe all of us have, whether conscious of it or not. It is the frustration of never being able to grasp the present. Never being able to hold on to a moment except by memory. "Words after speech, reach into the silence." -T.S. Elliot (alright so I have little obsession with his writings right now! More specifically "The Four Quartets":~). Speech, music, thought, and reading all take time! And all, after a little while reach into the silence only to echo in your mind.

I hope this made some sense.... thoughts such as these tend circle around inside my head more often than not and need to be organized somewhere (whether or not they come across understandable!). Truly, time is an amazing thing.

On Obedience

Is there a right way or a wrong way to obey? I sometimes wonder what exactly obedience is. It is often looked upon with disdain yet encouraged as a sort of virtue. Here is what I've come up with:
Obedience is a selfless act, yet often I obey only when it is convenient. However, by only obeying when it is convenient seems to completely counteract what obedience means, thereby no longer constituting it as obedience. Often obedience is looked upon as some kind of duty. Turning it into a task rather than a service. Which in one sense that is true, however, I do not believe it was meant to be looked at in that way. As I have wrestled with this thought, it occurred to me that obedience is to be looked at and carried out with joy. Obedience is to be met with true joy, not the kind that one may be able to muster up in his/her own strength, but that same kind of joy which words could not express. The joy that Lewis talks about in his biography.

Yet in our culture we have replaced the word obedience with words such as "chores" and "tasks". We have replaced something positive with something of a negative meaning. Because obedience does not necessarily fulfill my selfish desires it is looked upon with disdain. Sometimes however, it is for our own good yet we may not see it at the time.

Obeying the speed limit on the highways is beneficial for me although I would much rather be going faster! Our perspective of obedience has been so disgruntled it is nearly impossible for us to take part in any kind of service without a selfish motive. Obedience now is a means to gain recognition or respect. It is like saying, "I read my Bible every morning because that means that God is looking down on me with a smile!" Far be it from me to ever think such thoughts again!

How could I think that reading my Bible has ever made God love me that much more? As if I could appease Him through my selfish obedience! I love the words from Caedmon's Call song "Mystery of Mercy"; "All my love was vinegar to a thirsty King." I have nothing for God to take pleasure in. We are not to obey God's commandments because it is some kind of chore or because it'll make God love us more, rather we should naturally want to obey because it is where we find that unexplainable joy. It is to be a natural reaction that we have when we finally realize the magnitude of love our creator has for us.

To answer my question at the beginning: I do believe that there is a right way and a wrong way to obey. However, the latter is not obedience at all while the former should be our natural response to the King who died a criminal’s death that we might find true joy.